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PROPOSED CHANGES
TO MINIMUM
STANDARDS
Please clear
your calendars
for Tuesday,
April 20 and
plan to converge
on Austin for a
critical public
hearing by Child
Care Licensing
and the Human
Services
Commission on
proposed changes
to Minimum
Standards,
including
REVISED RATIOS
AND GROUP SIZES
that we have
been discussing
recently.
This will be our
last opportunity
to oppose and
hopefully defeat
these proposed
new ratios and
group sizes.
Unfortunately,
a small group
will be
ineffective, no
matter how
impassioned or
reasonable our
testimony may
be. We will only
be successful if
we mobilize a
huge group
to fill the
hearing room and
make it
impossible for
our opposition
to the changes
to be ignored.
LET'S FILL THE
CAPITOL ON APRIL
20 WITH OWNERS,
DIRECTORS,
PARENTS AND
SUPPORTERS.
This is our last
chance on these
changes! For
more
information,
please contact
David Fincher
cottonmilltx@yahoo.com
or 972.412.6864.
The Bad News
"Bears" we must
discuss with the
parents/clients
at our child
care centers are
late payments,
sick children,
untimely
arrivals and
departures
(late!), minor
injuries and the
biggest bear of
all, their
child's
misbehavior.
Grrrr!
Do you have
employee
policies in
place that
outline what
issues should be
brought to a
parent's
attention and
which should
not, and what
steps to go
through? The
only acceptable
outcome for any
issue we take to
a parent is
"win/win." For
example, Mrs.
Brown would
always become
angry and
verbally abusive
when called to
pick up her
child when the
child was ill
and running a
fever.
Attempting to
"bully" the
director into
backing down,
she would state
that her child's
normal
temperature was
at least 100 so
she wasn't
actually running
a fever of 102
as the
thermometer
indicated or
that the school
used "cheap
thermometers"
that were not
accurate. She
also insisted
that vomiting
"only makes one
feel better, not
worse," and "I
have to work!
What am I paying
you people for?"
Rather than butt
heads with her
and cast doubt
on her honesty,
the director
simply said, "I
understand that
it is difficult
to have to leave
work when your
child is ill
especially since
there seem to be
special
guidelines that
determine when
Samantha is
truly ill. We
appreciate your
trust in us to
care for her and
I know that you
respect the
guidelines we
have to abide
by. The solution
suddenly occurrs
to me and it's
very simple.
SInce you have
to pick her up
now anyway,
could you get a
note from her
pediatrician
that supports
what you're
telling me so
that I can put
it in Samantha's
file? That would
really solve the
whole problem
and I would
appreciate it so
much." The note
never
materialized
and, after that,
anytime Mrs.
Brown was called
because Samantha
was ill, her
only response
was "I will be
there within the
hour" and she
would be.
Regarding
behavior issues,
we must remember
that our job in
the child care
center/preschool
is to educate
the whole
child. On her
second day as
director of an
already
established
preschool and
child care
center, Kathy
saw a father in
the parking lot
with his 5 year
old son,
Derrick. The
father looked
absolutely
defeated as they
just continued
to stand there.
Kathy went to
him and asked
him if
everything was
ok and he handed
her a note. It
was from
Derrick's
teacher (Kathy's
employee) and
was written in
all capital
letters and
exclamation
points and read,
"Derrick hurt so
many people
today I lost
count! I think
he even ran out
of people and
finally had to
resort to
hurting himself!
This must stop!
He knows the
rules but
chooses to
ignore them!"
Kathy said, "
Mr. Sawyer, you
know I am new
here. I need you
to do me a
favor. May I
have this note?
And will you let
me handle this
situation with
Derrick? I want
to visit him in
his classroom
and see what's
going on. I am
confident that I
can help Derrick
and his teacher
fix this here at
school. May I
give you some
feedback in a
week?" Then she
bent down to
Derrick and
said, "I will
come and see you
in your class
tomorrow. I need
you to show me
what your
favorite
centers, toys
and activities
are in the
classroom, so
think about that
tonight, ok?"
She then shook
hands with both
of them and told
them to have a
good evening.
In early
childhood, very
few behavior
issues should be
taken to the
parent. As we
are teaching
ABC's and 123's,
we must remember
to teach
appropriate
emotional and
social skills.
We must teach
children how to
appropriately
respond to
disappointment,
frustration,
boredom, hunger,
fatigue and
anger. How to be
a good leader,
how to be part
of a group, how
to make friends,
how to be a
friend, how to
use their words
to solve
problems rather
than to hit,
bite or have a
tantrum are a
natural part of
the preschool
curriculum for
children from
birth through
the age of five.
Ensure that your
teachers know
that before any
behavior issue
is taken to a
parent, they are
to inform you or
another
appropriate
supervisor first
so that a "self
check" can be
conducted.
Prior to taking
any issue to a
parent, we have
to ask ourselves
some important
questions. Have
we formed the
proper
relationship
with this
parent? Have we
reported to her
at least a dozen
positive things
about her child
before bringing
up an issue? If
the issue is
behavior, is the
teacher expecting
the child to
"fit a certain
behavior mold"
rather than
meeting his
individual
needs? That is
not a parenting
issue. Are we
asking him to
stay on one task
for too long? Is
he
intellectually
stimulated and
having fun in
the classroom?
What strategies
have we already
tried to teach
the child
appropriate
behavior that
will eliminate
the
inappropriate
behavior? Is the
teacher
consistent in
how she deals
with the child?
Does she follow
the daily
schedule and
lesson plan?
Does she make
certain that the
parents (aka
clients) view
her as a
professional
rather than a
"babysitter?"
Parents form
their opinions
about the
teachers and the
school/center
based on the few
minutes they
spend with us in
the morning and
in the
afternoon. What
do they see and
hear? In other
words, are we
doing everything
at school that
we should be
doing and do the
parents "see us
in action?"
Parents are our
clients, not our
friends. It is
essential that
all employees of
the child care
center establish
a professional
relationship
that is
personable but
that doesn't
cross the line
into personal. A
personable
relationship is
friendly and
pleasant and
demonstrates
that "this is a
good school for
young children
with teachers
who are
knowledgeable,
professional and
caring." If,
however, the
relationship
with the parent
is (or is
perceived by the
parent as) a
personal/social
relationship,
she will feel
betrayed when
you or the
teacher bring up
problems with
her child's
behavior, late
payments, policy
infractions such
as picking up
her child after
closing time,
rules regarding
medications,
etc. Her
reaction will
most likely be
to flee or
retaliate rather
than to
cooperate.
Know your
clients. Just as
the same tactics
do not
necessarily work
with every
child, parents
also need to be
recognized as
individuals and
dealt with
appropriately.
Anticipate their
reactions.
Educate your
staff on the
proper way to
deal with
parents. In all
instances we
want to sandwich
the bad news
between two
positive
statements about
the child.
Two Examples:
Hanna
Handwringer
is a parent who
worries a lot
and who chose
your school
because she
sensed a loving
atmosphere when
she toured. She
needs to be
dealt with in a
nurturing way.
She needs
reassurance that
you and the
teacher love her
child, value her
as a good
parent, and will
coach her on how
best to support
her child and
the school
during the
current issue.
She is apt to
accidentally
"reward" the
child for
misbehaving by
giving him extra
attention when
he misbehaves at
school. She will
end up
frustrated if
not gently
educated on
tactics such as
"tough love" and
the value of
using extra time
with mom as a
reward for
proper behavior.
Busy Betty,
on the other
hand,
intellectually
chose your
school because
she was
convinced that
it was a good
school for her
child and
staffed by
capable and
caring teachers.
She trusts the
people at the
school to do
their jobs. When
you need to
present her with
an issue, remain
friendly,
professional and
caring but
unemotional as
you give her the
facts of the
situation.
When told that
their child is
misbehaving, the
two usual
responses
from most
parents are
"He's very
smart. He must
be bored," or
"He never does
that at home. He
must have
learned it
here." Don't get
sidetracked into
an argument. If
you try to
determine that
one of you is
right and one of
you is wrong,
you are aiming
for a "win/lose"
solution. Go for
"win/win" by not
allowing the
defensive
response to
become the
issue.
Statements such
as "I understand
what you are
saying and of
course we
considered that,
too," or "I knew
you would want
to know so that
we can all work
together to get
Chris back on
track," and even
""It's great
that this is not
an issue when he
is with you.
Perhaps it would
be helpful if we
considered what
the response
would be if he
did do this at
home?" or "You
strike me as a
leader, Mrs.
Brown. We see
those same
characteristics
in Chris. Let's
work together as
he learns
self-discipline
and
discernment."
It is always
helpful to point
out that some of
the smartest and
best inventors,
artists,
astronauts,
athletes, actors
and millionaires
were also
"feisty
children," as we
comment "He has
a wonderful
spirit!"
It is possible
to have great
communication
with the
parents/clients
of your center
as long as they
know that you
and your staff
appreciate and
treasure their
children as
individuals, and
value parents as
an important
part of your
team.
Friday, April 16
& Sat. April 17
806-763-1200
Holiday Inn
Towers 801
Avenue Q
LUBBOCK,
TX 79401
Friday, April 23
& Sat. April 24
972-329-3100
Hampton Inn &
Suites 1700
Rodeo Dr.
MESQUITE,TX
75149
Friday, April 30
& Sat. May 1
817-460-2500
Holiday Inn 1311
Wet-n-Wild Way
ARLINGTON,
TX 76011
Friday, May 14 &
Sat. May 15
817-460-2500
Holiday Inn 1434
Centre Place Dr.
DENTON,TX
76205
Friday, May 21 &
Sat. May 22
903-597-1301
Quality
Hotel 2843 WNW
Loop 323
TYLER, TX
75702
Visit
www.thechildcareconsultinggroup.com
to download
the registration
form under the
CONFERENCE tab,
or call
972-979-0282 for
more information
on these
exciting
training
sessions.
Highly-Successful
DFW Area Child
Care Business
& Real Estate
-Asking Price
$2,500,000.00
This established
Child Care
Center is
located in one
of the fastest
growing counties
in the United
States. (Located
in highly
desirable suburb
east of Dallas)
See you next
month with more
new and exciting
ideas and
information!
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